The Hargrove Home

I am not a beauty person at all. Clarification: I don't wear any make up except for mascara and eyeliner, I usually only have one bottle of perfume at a time, I don't go out of my way to buy special things to wash my face, etc. Not because I don't take pride in my appearance but because I've just never been a huge girly girl. And up until today I had never used a sugar scrub. I had seen them before but I honestly didn't even know if there were any true benefits to using them on your skin. In typical Bre fashion I started to research sugar scrubs (nerd alert) and found some really neat things. The sugar actually brings moisture into your skin and unlike salt its very gentle. So, after playing around a bit I came up with my own recipe and I love it!

I've seen the sweet articles floating around Facebook these past few days. The one dedicated to the mom at Target and the mom at Chick Fil A. This blog is for neither, it's for you, mom at home.

I don't see you because you're locked safely behind your door, tucked inside the 4 walls of your home. I don't see you but I do know you. As I'm typing this I'm still in my PJ's, curled up on the chair in my sons room as he sits in the corner playing with random toys. You read the articles about Target and Chick Fil A mom and you understood what they were saying but personally you can't really relate. I know. You don't go out for many reasons. Sometimes it's because you don't have enough money to splurge at Target or Chick Fil A. Sometimes it's because you're so devoted to nap times that you live your life around them. Or maybe you share a car with your husband who works hard for you so there really isn't a way for you to get out and about. Maybe you simply don't like being the furious mom in the Target parking lot. Maybe home feels safer than risking the anxiety attacks that come from kids piled in a cart. An outing that was suppose to help you get out of the house quickly sends you rushing back home so that your children can throw their tantrums where no one else will see....or judge.

I don't see you because you're not out here mingling and truth be told I don't see you because I'm not out either. I know you because I am you. I don't think you're wrong for wanting to stay home. I get it. I really, really do. There is a certain amount of comfort that comes from the routine you've made for you and your children. I get that. Or maybe you're like me and you're still kinda new to the town you're living in. Your family is here, you've joined a wonderful church that you're serving in but you still haven't found many mom friends that don't have other things going on. Your kids are still little and maybe they have older children who have to be taken to school or MDO. I know that feeling.

I know the feeling you get when your husband kisses you on the forehead before leaving for work and you get a sudden sadness as you realize the next time you see him will be 12 hours from now. And the other sadness that breaks you when you realize he didn't get to see the kids all day. It's ok to feel like that. I think the thing that's even more sad than that is the fact that no one talks about it. The busy moms who read this on their phones in the car while they're waiting in the drive thru line for lunch...dont' feel sorry for us. We know staying isolated isn't good and we're working on it. We're working hard to break through the comfortability of the every day and just step outside of ourselves for a while. We really do want to meet you at Target just to walk around and chat or share some laughs over nuggets while the kids run in and out of tunnels in the play area. Give us time. Until then maybe you could take us up on our offer to share a cup of coffee on our couch instead of at Starbucks.

It may seem annoying at times, trust me, I'm even annoyed at it sometimes. But the reality is I don't know your story and you don't know mine. I want to know yours though. I want to know why you run millions of errands, never letting your kids get a good nap in. And I want you to know why my kid is 16 months old and still takes 2 naps a day plus is in bed at 8:30 each night. Share your story with me and I'll share mine with you. No judgement or ridicule. Just two moms who have an understanding that you do whatever works best for you and you family. Because I don't quite understand you but I really want to. So, come sit on my couch for a little while. We have stories to share, mama.

I think just by the title it sounds like such a lovely thing. A town home in the city must be beautiful! I'm here to tell you that isn't always the case but one thing I believe for sure is that you can always, always make your living environment functional and beautiful. My family lives in a 3 bedroom/2 bath town home in a city in Texas. It's not everything we dreamed it would be but I think that's mostly because we have a toddler now and are dreaming of the day that we can get a house with a backyard for him to run around. However, like stated above, you can always make something work for you and the season of life you and your family are in.

See. Functional. We didn't have any storage for our bigger items so we had to create something. We had empty space underneath the stairs so we pushed our couch up against to create a make shift storage area. It holds most of our outside items-bike, golf clubs, chars, etc. I thought it would look very tacky but surprisingly enough it looks normal as if that's all it was meant for.



One thing I wish we had here is Compass. This fantastic website helps match you (MATCH YOU) to your ideal apartment. My husband and I had to Google and search and ask all around before we found a place here and even then it's still not exactly what we're looking for. With a site like Urban Compass we could have found a place in our budget as well as one in a neighborhood that fit our personality and taste. Maybe someone will be genius enough to follow in the footsteps of these New Yorkers and create one for Texas someday.

I've been a tad overwhelmed all day. I have that "Sunday evening" feeling that I use to get when I was in school. The dreaded feeling that Monday begins another week of school and classes and homework, etc. Except Monday brings much harder work than school, it brings the work week and for me that obviously means staying home with Elijah. Please, before you laugh at that remember to not judge. Every job has its hardships and staying at home whether you're a wife or a mama too can be tasking. Kaleb works all week so his next day off won't come until next Sunday. This reality brought on the "Sunday evening" feeling for me all day today. I know that I will wake up tomorrow and start another hard week of mothering, tantrums, cooking, cleaning, diaper changes, slapping (a recent discovery my toddler has made), yelling (yep, real life..don't pretend you don't do it too), and the works. The "Sunday evening" feeling can bring on loads of anxiety for me.

Look up!

I never had anxiety until Elijah was born and now it seems to get worse as he gets older and older. While I completely believe that God made such beautiful things like essential oils to help with this (I love my Peace and Calm and Joy oil). I also believe that anxiety is not something I should just sit and be ok with. When I think of the week ahead and the things I mentioned above I can see myself doing these tasks, walking up and down the stairs, stepping over baby gates...and doing it all while looking down. That's not the way.

Look up!

He's calling me and you to look up from the trenches and overcome this. Just simply look up. Remember the purpose, remember there is a light at the end of the tunnel, remember that this too has meaning.

Look up!

This too shall pass. The tantrums that leave you feeling like you're doing this mothering thing all wrong. The constant hours you log at a job that you find no meaning in. The ends you're trying to force to meet but seem to be completely running away from each other. All of it. It will all pass. And that's something I have to remind myself to do. Let the anxiety pass. Look up and just let it fall away. This does not have a stronghold over me or you, friend. Get ready for the week ahead with me, will you? The JOY of the week to come. Pray it out. Everything you're anxious for and over. Pray. It. Out.

There are a couple of exciting things going on in our home that have developed over the last few days. As of yesterday I am now the Social Media Manager for author Jodie Mitchell. She is my friends aunt and has self published 3 books of poetry (The Trusting Time, In The Suffering, Careful Whispers) and is currently working on her new book Legacy which will be releasing soon. I am so excited to help spread the word about all of her books. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter and while you're at it check out her and her husbands ministry called April Sky Ministries. Seeing first hand how social media can help keep others updated on your works/works in progress I created (again) my own Twitter account. So follow, follow, follow!

Another wonderful opportunity God has presented us with is within the company Kaleb works for. I can't say what it is officially on here but keep us in your prayers and as soon as I get the ok I will let you all know. I thought that moving to Fort Worth  would open up doors for Kaleb but now I see that doors are being opened up for me as well and not to mention our family in general. We are also currently taking classes to become members at our new church. So many exciting and new changes happening that I had to share them with you all ASAP! All of these changes bring new meaning to Jeremiah 29:11-

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

First off I wanted to leave these here because I am so proud of myself for keeping up with these posts for an entire year:

With a heavy heart

San Angelo

It's where I laid myself upon an altar and died only to rise a born again someone.
It's where my 2 years of college education began and ended but not indefinitely.
It's where a scrawny freshman slid his phone across the carpet and asked me for my number.
It's where God showed up and rescued me, pulling me from the muck and the mire and cleansing my soul.
It's where I danced in front of the mirror with Amy and shared 4 am conversations with Whitney.
Where I started working with babies and discovered a love for children I never knew I had.
Where I made many mistakes but learned to run to Jesus instead of from Him.
Where that scrawny freshman gave me my first flower on our first Valentines day together.
Where I finally got on stage and learned to deal with my fear.
Where someone thought I was worthy enough to lead others.
Where I became a part of a leadership team that became more than people; they became family.
Where that scrawny freshman cried on my shoulder and I cried too.
Where I found my mentor.
Where I found community.
Where I found a pastor who gave me food to eat and fed me the Word as well.
Where God told me I would clean up messes and I did.
Where He told me to step back and really look.
Where He told me to stay because the workers were few but the harvest was great.
Where I fell in love with that scrawny freshman and discovered he was the man I'd been praying for.
Where that scrawny freshman became not so scrawny and where we shared our first kiss.
Where my life finally made sense.
Where I wrestled with the Lord over and over when mending my brokeness.
Where He restored my heart and made me new.
Where that boy decided to make our first kiss, my last first kiss.
Where I discovered my fear of friendships and lost a lot of people.
Where I drove a few girls away who were counting on me.
Where I learned how to two step by a lake.
It's where I found modesty and purity to be the very thing God was asking of me.
It's where I got the phone call that my mamaw had passed away.
It's where Sarah dropped her homework and came to my dorm to pray over me.
It's where I found out I was pregnant and jumped off the couch to hug that man I married.
It's where I learned motherhood cannot be done alone.
It's where I finally opened up about my miscarriage.
It's where I first went to Hastings and fell in love with the book section.
Where I was 18 and Mari told me the Lord was writing my love story over 2 am messages on Facebook.
It's where I began blogging and where I discovered an online community who got me.
It's where I became addicted to coffee.
It's where I came back from my honeymoon and stopped being a fiancé and started being a wife.
It's where I helped Sabrina fight for breastfeeding.
Where I saw Maroon 5 and Fitz and The Tantrums in concert.
Where I stood by the bon fire and decided there was more.
Where I went to the lake at midnight with my XA friends and got moved by the Holy Spirit.
It's where I met the most amazing OB/GYN and cried with friends when we had to say good-bye.
It's where honoring one another became harder than I could imagine.
It's where I woke up each Sunday eager to go to church.
It's where I discovered my heart for young couples and new moms.

San Angelo...

It's an anointing oil spilling over me and the smell of a new dorm.
It's living on my own for the first time.
It's ratty furniture and hand-me-down dishes.
It's packages in the mail and tearful good byes.
It's phone calls to my family and Charlotte moving to live with me.
It's Charlotte moving back to Fort Worth after my wedding.
It's learning that being sick without your mom to take care of you sucks pretty hard.
It's no money to pay rent until a little owl card comes and a vase of flowers.
It's a grace laden friendship I can never let go of.
It's wisdom from wise counsel spilling over me time and time again.
It's tough conversations and lots of prayer.
It's learning to cook and bake.
It's countless baby and bridal showers.
It's weddings I danced at and several I cried at.
It's new relationships to discover.
It's delivering my first child.
It's a doula and lactation consultant who rocked my world.
It's postpartum tears shared in a dark living room with Sarah the day she showed me how to nurse.
It's discovering I can do all things through Christ. 
It's driving to Ashlee and Heath's house to share my broken heart.
It's a dimly lit hallway I walked down with my RA friend for nightly rounds.
It's midnight laundry washing at Texan Hall.
It's girl's night at Keely's place with prayer instead of gossip.
It's a night ride on the back of the motorcycle.
It's playing football in the snow and worship in the apartment.
It's Zero One Ale House and Armenta's.
It's getting close to The Ferguson's right before they moved away.
It's singing to raise money for missions.
It's hugging Kayla on the front pew and telling her I'm sorry.
It's too much ramen and so much free food.
It's parties at The Grove and learning what BC days are all about.
It's traveling from dorm to dorm with new friends.
It's my-face-in-the-carpet type prayers.
It's Mali, Jake, Ellie, Grayson, and Lylah being etched in my heart forever.
It's sharing life in married life group and realizing how much I need them.
It's late night conversations at the Kotze's while Elijah snoozes in the pack n play.
It's one movie theatre and a one story mall.
It's wishing Baker Street would come back.
It's DMB always coming through the speakers.
It's an inspiration of health from The Taylor's.
It's accountability I never asked for but desperately needed.
It's living in 4 apartments and 1 house over the span of 3 years.
It's the Holy Spirit falling every sunday morning at SAF.
It's praying at Starbucks during regroup.
It's 2 transitions of pastors whom I greatly love and respect.
It's worship that moved me to tears and sermons that grew me.
It's finally building a relationship with her only to let it fall between my fingers.
It's "click-click" and all of the memories that rush back.


It's San Angelo and no one can tell me any different.

Fort Worth, you have some pretty big shoes to fill.

Well, to start off, the house hunting was a total flop. We had our hearts set on a house in general but one impaticular that we were excited about dragged us around for a couple of weeks and then finally told us it had been leased. Other then that we just weren't having any luck. I thought this had to do with the fact that searching online for a house is hard but now I see that it was the Lord leading us in a different direction. Of course, as usual, I had my heart set on a house so bad that I didn't even stop to consider if the Lord would open up a different door for us. Pun totally intended right there. I had been wondering for a while if an apartment would be the way to go. I can't stand apartment life so I just figured that was a no but then Kaleb and I talked over the benefits. We would only have to sign a 6 month lease and then maybe could look into buying a home instead of renting one once it was up, utilities are lower, they're easier to find, and we could move in sooner.

So, to make a long story short we are moving into this cute little 2 story town home on June 7th! That is SOON, people. 3 weeks and we're out of here. We were in Fort Worth for a 2 day visit and we found this town home, filled out applications, and put the deposit down. It's a good feeling to have this part squared away. Kaleb also had lunch with his new boss while we were in town and is really excited about starting his new job as soon as we move. Things are falling into place at the exact time God ordained for them to and I'm so grateful. There's so much to do in such a short time that I found myself standing, frozen in the kitchen after Kaleb left for work this morning wondering what I should do first. As any motivated person would I decided to fold laundry and watch Call The Midwife. Which was quickly interrupted when Elijah decided to fall, bust his lip, and cause me to have a heart attack and rush him to the ER. No worries, no worries. He's completely fine. His frenulum was lacerated in the fall but the doctor said it will heal on his own and to just give him Tylenol for the pain.

There you have it, friends! The Hargrove's will be moving June 7th to Fort Worth. I am so excited and sad at the same time but we will be back for Caleb and Kaitlin's wedding on the 20th and I will definitely be having Elijah's first birthday party here in San Angelo so we will be back to visit and will not lose touch with the amazing friends God has blessed us with here.


"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens......a time to plant and a time to uproot" 

I'm not quite sure if anyone still calls it that but when I attended Crowley High School years ago that's what we called our neighbor town, B-town aka Burleson. That's right folks we're moving to Burleson. Or maybe we're moving to Fort Worth. Either way Kaleb has a job waiting for him in Burleson!!!!! There was a series of events in this application process ranging from "There are no more positions available in Fort Worth" to "Would you be willing to move to Austin?" It was enough to drive me crazy and I'm sure Kaleb was going a little mad himself. I have made my life public through this blog (which doesn't bother me one bit) so I would love to share the story with all of you about how this all unfolded.

Sunday morning I called Charlotte to see how her birthday went. We chatted for a while about her weekend, birthday, friends, etc. Then I decided to update her on everything. I told her the lady Kaleb had been in contact with had told him there were no positions available in Fort Worth but that she was looking into one in Austin for us. However, Kaleb's boss had been emailing back and forth with a DSM in Fort Worth who was looking for a new lead to help kick start the Sam's Club that was being relocated from Fort Worth to Burleson. It wasn't the supervisor position Kaleb had been praying for but it was a pay increase and a stepping stone into something bigger. I told Charlotte I wasn't sure if the pay increase was significant enough to allow us to be steady there but that I would hate for Kaleb to miss out on such a great opportunity. He would be learning how to work from the ground up and would get first dibs on any opening supervisor positions that would become available in the near future. Charlotte paused and declared she had a pretty good idea. But first let me brief you on my sisters living situations.

Charlotte's roommate decided to sell his house back in February so within a months time she had to find a place to live. Her boss and his family graciously opened their home to her and that's where she has been living for the last couple of months. You can imagine how awkward this is but it was her only place to go. So, Charlotte suggested she move in with us for a while in order to help us get grounded in Fort Worth and to allow her to save up money for her own place. Kaleb and I thoroughly enjoy being around Charlotte so this was an automatic yes but only if Kaleb got the job. He had emailed the DSM a week ago about details for the job but hadn't heard anything back so we weren't exactly holding our breath. After hanging up the phone I talked to God about it for quite a while. When Kaleb got off work we went for a walk around the park and let Elijah swing while we went over what exactly would need to be done if this worked out. Getting a 3 bedroom house, splitting all of the bills with Charlotte, nailing down a move date that would work for all of us, etc.

After dinner and Elijahs bath we sat down to relax for a bit before putting him to bed. I was texting someone, Elijah was playing, and Kaleb was checking his emails. He started getting a little over excited and read aloud an email to me that he had just opened. Tears filled to the brims, I jumped on the couch to hug Kaleb. He got the job! The DSM had told him he wanted him out there to help with the set up ASAP. It all lined up at just the right time and there it was-the answer to our prayers and even prayers of some of our friends who had been supporting us through this process. First thing I did was call my mom who cried, of course. And now you know where I get all of my crazy emotions from. Then Charlotte who was literally screaming through the phone at how excited she was. We immediately jumped on the computer and started searching Trulia and Zillow to find some houses for rent and in our price range. We have found a couple we like and one specifically that is in Crowley. The grand opening of the relocated club is July 10th but we are moving there on June 21st.

Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU to those of you who fought in prayer for us and I am thanking God for moving at the right time. I'm not good at waiting on the Lord, y'all. I'm really impatient to the point where I stress myself out and get down right angry at the unknown but He is always teaching me. Always. Even when it drives me nuts and I want to sit in the corner and pout like a 5 year old, still He teaches. I am sad to leave the people we love here in San Angelo and particularly sad about leaving our amazing church but I cannot wait to see what God has in store for us in Fort Worth.

It occurred to me as I started making dinner tonight that this recipe is one of my go-to/easy/yummy favorites straight from mama's kitchen. I use to ask her to make this all the time, y'all. All. The. Time.   And now I make it on the nights we can't figure out what to eat or want something easy and simple. So here it is:

Ranch/corn flake chicken:

Ingredients-
4-6 pieces of chicken strips
1 packet of ranch dressing seasoning
1 stick of butter, melted
1 1/2 C plain corn flakes, crushed

How to-
Preheat the oven to 350. Melt the stick of butter completely and then add the packet of ranch dressing seasoning, mix. In a separate bowl crush the cereal. I just use my hands for this but you can use a blender. Take each strip of chicken and soak it in the butter/ranch mixture then roll it in the cereal. Place them on a baking sheet lined with foil. I am ridiculous about being able to taste everything so I pour the remaining mixture of butter/ranch over each piece and then the crushed cereal as well. Bake for 1 hour. Literally it's THAT simple!

Enjoy!

I did 3 loads of laundry last night: Elijah's clothes, darks, and lights. I'm always doing laundry. It's kind of ridiculous that 2 adults and 1 small child can dirty so many clothes but alas it is my daily job and it really doesn't bother me. As I was sitting on the couch this morning folding Elijah's clothes I kept thinking "didn't I just fold this same bear towel just the other day? And I know he literally just wore these shorts the other day how are they already washed and dried again? This is never ending." And it's not. The mundane life I lead with the everyday things won't have an end probably ever. How am I suppose to see Jesus in folding laundry? You see I've been trying really hard to see Jesus in everything. I long to walk in the Spirit more and I think a lot of that begins in seeing the Lord at work all around me. It's easy to see Him when I'm worshipping with thousands of other men and women at a conference or in a sentence my pastor speaks on a Sunday morning but it's harder to see Him in the mundane. When my life feels like it's on repeat and I'm doing the same thing over and over again, can I still see Him and figure out what He's trying to teach me?

I'm sitting by myself in my living room right now writing this post. Do you know how long it's been since I sat by myself? Elijah is asleep and Kaleb had to go back to work to refill some machine (Whatever SAMS club) and so here I sit with my thoughts and my blog. I can't really gather my thoughts in all honesty. They're just a jumble of words floating at the surface of the water kinda like my family. Kaleb is searching for a second job….again. I thought we were out of this season but we're not. We can't seem to get ahead. Kaleb's hours are so wonky lately. One week he'll work 4-5 days straight and the next he'll have 2 days scattered in a week. That's not enough. We haven't paid on our student loans in 6 months, we have every day bills/expenses, and now we have to get our emergency break fixed so that we can get our inspection passed and pay off the ticket we got for having it expired in the first place. Which brings us to the conclusion that he has to get a second job. Something part time, a 2-3 day a week kinda gig. So, if you're reading this and you know of somewhere that is hiring then please let us know. Anyway…Kaleb. *sigh* It's hard to watch your husband go through this. Quitting jobs only to get better ones then quitting those ones and looking for new ones to finally getting a great job where he's working his way up only to having to find a second job. I'm at a loss. We agreed from the beginning that I would stay home with Elijah. Daycare isn't an option for us so here I sit typing a blog while he's at work again. My heart aches for him but this is scripture being lived out the way God said it would be.