I've said in a previous post that I don't write about things I haven't personally experienced or that I don't have a heart for. So, naturally this post was hard to come to but I can't sit back and watch it happen. When Fifty Shades of Grey came out, along with Magic Mike I remember sharing this blog. She did a fantastic job on that post. And like she stated at the beginning she just felt compelled to do so. Sylvia Plath said it best when she said "I write because there is a voice within me that will not be still." I usually quiet that voice on controversial topics (and lets be honest this is, sadly, a controversial topic now) but I just can't. Not now with the new trailer that has just surfaced for the upcoming movie.

I can't be naive and think that this post should reach certain people. I know that if you're not a Christian you may not agree with me and you know what? That's perfectly ok. If you don't know God then of course I don't expect you to feel convicted over the same things I do but Christian women I'm speaking to you. I'm your sister and I love you deeply so I have to say it-this movie, this book, this porn is not ok. It's. Not. Ok. You don't get a free pass to go watch this movie because it's girls night or because it's being shown in theaters.

"Well it's not porn because obviously they don't show porn in movie theaters."

Actually they do. Any sex scene is essentially porn. The definition of pornography is "the portrayal of sexual subject matter for the purpose of sexual arousal." Kaleb and I talk about it all the time when watching new movies-majority of the plot lines in newer movies could do without the sex scene they put in there which normally ends up being a few to even several sexual scenes. We would all still understand that the characters just had sex if you do a quick make out scene and cut to their clothes strewn across the floor. I mean really this whole drawn out "love making" scene isn't necessary but I can't find a movie without it anymore. And Fifty Shades of Grey tops all of them in that department.

If you wouldn't want to see your son/husband/brother/father/pastor watching porn on his computer then why is it any different if you go see this movie? This is a stumbling block. Point blank. Not just for others but for your self as well. You could have no tie to pornography and then watch this movie only for it to open up an ugly door and lead you down a path you never thought you would have to walk down. I keep seeing articles and blog posts floating around the internet lately about men and pornography and the huge moral issue at hand. But why is that so limited to men? It's a problem for women as well and it should be addressed. 2 Corinthians 6:3 says "We put no stumbling block in anyone's path, so that our ministry will not be discredited." The youth pastor cannot flip through the pages of Playboy while sipping coffee with one of his students and then close it only to tell him about the Lord. You may think you don't have a ministry but being a light in the world is your ministry and you are held to the same standards. You cannot go see Fifty Shades of Grey and then the next day claim to love the Lord. It doesn't work that way and I'm not sure why we stopped speaking truth in this area. Are you going to go to hell? Probably not. But why take advantage of such a kind and sweet God who shows us endless grace and mercy? He holds you to a higher standard not because He wants to make it hard for you but because He knows you're capable of more if you're following Him. In your weakness, His strength is made perfect (2 Corinthians 12:9).

Lust doesn't start in your mind just like adultery doesn't start outside of the marriage bed. Both begin in your heart and spiral into a place you could quite possibly never come back from.  Matthew 5:28 tells us that "anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery in his heart." We are told to guard our heart because everything else comes from it. (Proverbs 4:23) Guarding your heart starts with guarding those things that are easily prone to sin. Your eyes, your
thoughts, etc. This isn't always the case but let's spin a scenario here-

After watching this movie with the girls you feel a little more aroused than usual. You were thinking of your husband the whole time while watching it and you can't wait to get back home to him. Oh, darn. He's already asleep. You'll catch him tomorrow after work. Uh oh. There's that guy in the mail room who looks kind of like Christian Grey. Wow. You never noticed how similar they look. Suddenly your mind is spinning with adulterated thoughts of an office affair like in the movie. You shake them off until a few weeks go by and when you're with your husband your thoughts are not on him and the love you create together, it's on that guy from the mail room. You imagine him instead of your husband but never speak a word of it to anyone. This continues for months until one day that Christian Grey look alike makes one pass at you the same day your husband forgot your anniversary (again) and suddenly you find yourself having an affair.

Is that over the top? Possibly. Or is it exactly how things like that happen. I'm sure if you interviewed majority of the people who have had affairs they could tell you that it started right there. It was one slip of a mouse click or one fleeting thought about the guy that worked across the hall only to turn into something they never expected. Maybe we don't realize it everyday but Satan works pretty hard at getting us to fall, sin, and even walk away from the Lord. That one tiny thought he planted goes a long way when the right things are said at the right time by the right person. I will not cheat on Kaleb and he won't cheat on me but does that mean we stop guarding ourselves? No way! God commands it and so we do it. Am I saying that one movie can change the course of your life? Absolutely. Like I said above one small thing can open a door that you may not be able to close later on so why risk it.

Ultimately this movie feeds into the lie that sex is just sex. I'm going to go ahead and say it-sex is never just sex. It's a bond forever tying you to that person in a way that God only intended you to be tied to your spouse. If your relationship status is the issue then the same thing applies to you. It wasn't long ago that this was my story, praying over my soul ties to certain guys so that I could be tied to Kaleb instead. It was a mistake that I greatly regret but God is good and he heals and restores. However, I'd be lying if I said I didn't wish I could go back in time and choose to say no. The Bible speaks against sexual immorality countless times. It's not an annoying thing that Christians should follow. It's God already seeing the end result to something that could be very fatal with your relationship in regards to Him and to others. Sin being inevitable does not mean Holiness is unachievable. 1 Thessalonians 4: 3-5 says "For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God.." and in 1 Peter 2:11 He says "Beloved, I urge you as sojourners and exiles to abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your soul." That word didn't happen on accident. He chose to say that it would wage a war because it's truth. But if it's a struggle in regards to this movie-PRAY! Seek out His word. Don't pass it by if you feel He is urging you away. Trust in Him. He always gives you a way out when you're feeling tempted (1 Corinthians 10:13).