38 weeks at 1 am

11:15 PM

Yep, 38 weeks today. Elijah's cradle is literally inches from my face and even in a semi dark room, I'm staring into it wishing he was there. If he comes within this week, fantastic! And if he waits till his due date that's still only 2 weeks away. Honestly, it's all too fast yet not fast enough.


 A little knee just pushed on my rib cage. He must be a night owl, too.

I read 2 books to him tonight as I
rocked in the chair in the nursery while Kaleb sat across from me on the futon, listening and playing on the iPad. When I was finished I sat next to him and asked if he would pray over Elijah and I. That was the first time a prayer was spoken to Jesus in his nursery. I feel like that room is now the most blessed room in our tiny apartment.

I'm terrified and excited and overwhelmed with what ifs

Kaleb starts training for his new job tomorrow. They know we're on baby watch as does his other job. Both families are on full alert with every phone call and text. And any time Kaleb leaves the apartment he's ready to go. The car seat is in place and all of our bags are packed and waiting on each side of the bed.  All clothes are washed and organized. And the bottom drawer of my nightstand is stocked with things he may need at 3 am when I don't want to walk to his nursery (diapers, wipes, extra sleepers, swaddle blanket, creams, burp rags, and soothie.)

I feel ridiculously over prepared yet so not ready at the same time. Pray for me. 


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